Dear Facebook,

Facebook, Facebook, Facebook. What happened to you? What’s happened to us? When I first started seeing you, I was still in college. You promised me exclusivity, and in return I shared important information and intriguing facts about me that hardly anyone knew at the time, including the fact that I truly believe “The Great Gatsby” and “Confessions of a Shopaholic” are two of the greatest books of all time.

After some time of that, you began sneaking around. My friends told me that you were flirting with the idea of letting high school students join us. What?!? These were high school students. I thought you and I were beyond that. But you let high school students on, and I eventually became used to that fact. I still loved you, no matter how you treated me.

Once I got used to that (and almost forgot about it, actually), you threw another curveball my way. I was told that you were going to see anyone over the age of 13. Anyone. What happened to the exclusivity? I felt like you were changing, yet I had stayed the same. I tried to break up with you then, but you lured me back. We had so many mutual friends, and you always managed to come up in conversations. How could I not stay away from you?

Then you began messing with your appearance. I originally loved your simplicity – that was the best part about you. But then you introduced applications and became cluttered. I began to get invitations to events that I would never, ever want to attend. And you began sharing my information. I had to ensure – constantly – that my security settings were always set on private rather than the default public options. I began to get tired of you.

And now, here we are. At the beginning of the year, you basically told me that you didn’t care about my feelings or security. You’re completely different from when I first met you – which is okay, because change is a part of life. But I can’t help but think that your defiance is just a knee-jerk reaction to the other cutie in the room, Twitter. And you’re going about it all wrong, Facebook. You were my first love. But of course I’m going to see Twitter. Why shouldn’t I? You so clearly don’t care about me.

So I’ve made the harsh decision of keeping some of my private information from you. I first went up to my “Settings” tab, located at the top right hand side of my screen:

I then hit the “Privacy” section, which is the second to the last selection on the Settings page:

From there, I first clicked on “Profile Information”:

And there I was able to select who could see what about me. I changed the default settings from “Everyone” to “Only Friends.”

Sadly, I couldn’t stop there. I had to go back and go to “Contact Information” and repeat the same exercise, changing it so that not “Everyone” can see how to contact me. (I actually usually recommend that people keep SOME information public, but considering how accessible I am online, I keep my Facebook fairly private.)

Then, I had to go back AGAIN and click “Applications and Websites.” There, I had to select what my friends could share about me – because even if I choose not to have my information shared with everyone, that doesn’t mean that my friends feel the same way:

Facebook, I didn’t want to have to do this, but it’s done. And I’m very happy with Twitter and LinkedIn. But I do miss the way things were, and I dream about the way things could be once again if you take some time to go back to your roots. But until things change, I feel like it’s important for people to be aware of your thoughts on our privacy, how they have changed over the years, and what they can do to protect their privacy and security if they so desire.

Because now? You’ve set yourself up to become another MySpace. All it’s going to take is another college student with too much free time and a predilection for privacy, and Facebook could easily be a thing of the past.

Much love,

Carly

Was my letter too harsh? Completely off the mark? Do you agree with Facebook’s founder Mark Zuckerberg when he says that people don’t care about privacy anymore? And how do you protect your privacy online? Let me know in the comments!

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